Turn the other cheek or I'll make you meek . . .

As a child, upon misbehaving I was often informed flatly, “You’re going to be in a world of pain.” More often than not, such was the case: belt lashes across my backside or verbal degradation, like spikes hammered into the soft, fleshy crevices of my young mind, constituted nothing short of an entire universe of pain and remorse. I was constantly reminded of my own inferiority as a member of a family, and the consequent invalidity as a part of the whole of society; yet over the years, whenever I did something that was deemed wrong, the verbal or physical abuse that came as a retort was like second nature to me. It was only natural that when my actions caused a disruption in the moral consideration of another (“Do not hit your brother, that is wrong!) I should be punished according to my actions (“Smack!”). Accustomed to such a moral juxtaposition, it was inevitable that the ideological Christian lesson, “An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth” would become incomprehensible to me. According to the bible, an individual who becomes the focus of pain or suffering in any form (i.e. having one’s eye gouged out) is obligated to put himself or herself into a respectively similar amount of physical torment (gouging out your other good eye does more than suffice). In my life, the bearer of my ill-behavior and unruly disobedience—unpleasantries I think typical of any child—was nearly always one of my parents. Even if I performed an act of physical violence towards one of my siblings, the objective bearer of my wickedness, they were the ones to have their “eye gouged out” by my insubordination. In accordance with Christianity, the religion my parents were instructed to believe in and therefore chose for their children, “turning the other cheek,”—in this example perhaps turning away from their children’s misbehavior and allowing such sinful nature to take it’s course—was hardly ever the conclusion that was reached. Engulfed in their own rage, turning away from their own children’s misbehavior, allowing such sinful actions to go on would be personally unacceptable. Blinded by a sense of righteous indignation, as humans they felt the desire and need for vengeance. Physical or verbal punishment directed at their children was inevitably the quickest, most effective form. A smarting lash across the rear or the roar of reproach—either served equally efficient in silencing any disobedience. This moral concept found in Christianity sticks in my mind to this day with impassive furor and unmatched relativity to the personal moral and spiritual schism gaping wide in my consciousness today. In spite of my Christian upbringing, drowned in a world of physical and verbal violence I was as apt to embrace such an idyllic Christian concept as a mentally damaged newborn would be to grasp the overbearing love and concern and compassion flooding his or her parent’s minds.